The 40 Year Old Student

In an attempt to improve my life, last year I decided to resume my education. I began attending the local community college which my 19 year old daughter also attends. When I first began college 22 years ago I was a journalism major. I later changed to a Psychology major. I am currently an English major. Given that I am no longer at an age where I can ask,"What do I want to do when I grow up?," I am definitely sticking with English.Last semester I was enrolled in 6 units, one class online and one lecture. It was a bit intimidating to go into a classroom with students my daughter's age but after a while I got used to it.
Yesterday was the first day of the new semester and once again I had to face walking into a classroom of teenagers. The upper division English classes are held during the day and the majority of adults attend school in the evening. In my first class I received the usual odd glances as I took my seat behind a desk. Last year I was fortunate enough to be in a classroom with tables,this year not so much. Two of the three classes have those tiny desks that reduce you to your elementary school days. It also doesn't help that I am left-handed and I am not one of those people that writes with a crooked hand and ends up with ink all over their hand. No,I have mastered the art of left handed writing and slant my paper to the right in order to write neatly. This however is hard to do when the tiny desk is on your right hand side. In my first class I sat in the back and since I generally only need my glasses for driving at night, had to squint profusely to read what was on the board-fun times! At the end of class the professor asked us to answer a few questions. One of them was," What is one thing about you that will help me remember you?" I wrote," I am the old lady in the class." I'm pretty sure by tomorrow she will already know my name.
My second class was not so uncomfortable as it is the same classroom as the semester before. Unfortunately the professor who taught my previous class is on sabbatical or else she would have taught this one as well-she was great. This new professor is a bit behind the times-not that it's a problem for me. He does not accept emails,wants all papers printed and turned into him and does not want anyone chitchatting in class. He said that if we wanted to know what John and Mary did last night (come on he could have said Ashley and Josh) that we needed to wait until after class. I found him extremely amusing but as I looked around I noticed that my younger classmates didn't appear to feel the same way. I won't be surprised if there are a lot more empty seats tomorrow.
My final class of the day was math. And yes,being the true English major that I am,I hate math. I got a tip from a student in my class last year that this class was the one to take if you hate math. It is math for liberal arts majors and focuses on logic,statistics and probabilities. I am taking this class with my daughter and 38 other math haters. The evening classes have more adults but they also seem to have more angry people. Last semester I attempted to take an evening class but there were so many whiners,complainers and people who needed attention and therapy that I had to drop. I prefer to get the odd looks from the young'uns. Well this evening class was no exception.Cloudy Cathy (as opposed to Susie Sunshine) found every opportunity to bitch and moan. Fortunately my daughter was sitting next to me and I could flash little notes to her like, "there's always an angry person in the class, someone forgot to take her meds and *SCREAM*," yes, I am so mature. I honestly don't know if I am going to make it through the semester without telling her to shut up.

Monday thoughts

So I haven't written for a few days which means I have already broken a resolution-no surprise there. I am still meat free since last Sunday and surprisingly enough I don't really miss it. It makes it easier to just drive by all those fast food restaurants which used to taunt me with their calorie-laden offerings from the dollar menu. I have fruits and veggies in my refrigerator at work. Today I had a hummus,alfalfa sprout and spinach sandwich for funny. I had this funny thought cross my mind that I should change my name to Harmony,part my hair in the middle and sport a headband. Apparently the lack of protein is affecting my brain cells.
Well today I don't want to blog about broken resolutions,that is so passe. It is now the 11th of January and we should move on.Speaking of moving on,I am amazed at how immature women can be. Yesterday I made one of my usual witty comments (if I do say so myself) on a male friend's facebook page and was told by another of his female friends to back off. I still can't figure out what part of my comment seemed to convey that I was making a play for him as I was merely pointing out grammatical errors (yes,I'm a nerd.)Anyway she sounded as if she was in high school instead of being a woman in her forties. Come on ladies, if you are that insecure, you should not be in a relationship.
Well I guess I better get back to work,after all, blogging does not pay the bills.

Sabotage

Today I woke up with the resolve to go for a long walk. I went to my daughters’ rooms to wake them and then changed into my walking clothes. Ten minutes later the only one who was excited was the dog. She knows that when I’m wearing tennis shoes she gets to go outside. She practically did back flips until I put the leash on her collar. My nineteen year old woke up long enough to tell me she was too tired and my twelve year old didn’t budge-so much for our joint family effort to get in shape. It was really cold and the dog took care of her business right away, so my long walk turned into a short stroll around the block. I then returned home to attempt to use the stability ball and resistance bands.

I have to say that those fitness magazines are a joke, at least for those of us who are out of shape. They always have pictures of an extremely fit model demonstrating the exercises. I realize they wouldn’t sell many copies if they had pictures of overweight women but I am certain that I do not look nearly as graceful as the fit model and it doesn’t help my ego. It also doesn’t help that these exercises which appear to be so easy in the magazine are the exact opposite. I discovered that stability ball is a misnomer and should actually be called instability ball. Although I didn’t pop it as I had feared, I did roll off of it and it wasn’t fun. Fortunately it was in the privacy of my living room and there were no witnesses. The resistance bands were easier to use, although I couldn’t get through all the various sets and reps that the magazine suggested. After I finished my work out (although I’m not even sure it qualified as one), I sat on the couch and daydreamed. I imagined a world where a couch potato could burn calories just by sitting. If that world existed I would be thin and I wouldn’t have had to invest $20.00 into bands and balls. Instead I could have bought a few value meals at McDonald’s and sat on the couch, eating cheeseburgers and losing weight.

Good news-yesterday my 12 year old tried tofu for the first time. Bad news-today she ate a piece of bacon. It has only been three days and she broke our no eating meat for a month clause. I guess it didn’t help that we went to visit my parents this morning as they were eating a late breakfast. Knowing full well that we are avoiding meat, my mother offered us bacon. My daughter gave me a very sad look, you know that look that says, “Please, Mommy please.” I then told her she could have some if she wanted, although she knew by my tone I wasn’t happy about it. Although I didn’t see her eat it, she confessed in the car that she had snagged a piece while my parents and I were engaged in conversation. On our way out my mom invited us to return for dinner. I had noticed the two large pieces of meat thawing on her counter and reminded her that we were trying to be vegetarian for a month.

“I’ll put some vegetables in it,” she replied.

Thanks Mom, I really appreciate the support.

New Year's Resolutions 2010

1) lose weight
2) get organized
3)make more money
4)read a classic novel every month
5) write everyday

Except for numbers 4 and 5, I probably have the same resolutions as most people. The difference is that this year I am really going to do them ( I know-that's what everyone says.) I started on Sunday the 3rd because New Year's fell on a Friday and there were too many leftovers from my brother's party(showing great resolve already.) On Saturday I had to get rid of all the bad food in the house (by eating it of course-more resolve) which left no energy to work on resolution number 2, although I did start reading Don Quixote.
Sunday was a productive day. I made eggs and spinach for breakfast using a minuscule amount of olive oil for the spinach. Afterward I made a vegetarian chili. My daughters and I have agreed to give up meat for the month of January, part of the effort to achieve resolution 1. Did I mention we are major carnivores? Amazingly enough today is day 3 and we have survived. It does help that they sell imitation meat, which in a sense defeats the purpose. I guess it is similar to Nicorette that smoker's use when they are trying to kick the habit.
Yesterday I purchased an exercise ball and resistance bands. My youngest daughter pumped up the ball and I reviewed the manual. As much as I want to use the ball I am afraid that I will either pop it or roll off. The resistance bands seem easy enough to use, it is my resistance to exercise which is the problem.
Well off I go as I return to work on number 2. So far I have filled half a hefty bag of miscellaneous paperwork I saved for no apparent reason- so much fun (not.)